Friday, March 09, 2007

Modifying Insanity

I like to think I'm not the only crazy person out there. Surely there are others like me, others who say things like "hey! Let's completely cover a bodice with hand-beading for a six-year-old's halloween costume!" or "gee, it really does sound like a great idea to design and craft a dozen or so three-dimensional, watercolored pop-up invitations to a birthday party!"

So, I'm going to just assume that somewhere out there is someone else who decides it's a brilliant idea to cut their hair mere days before two major job interviews AND to do it themselves. For those people, the following tips:

1. Start with very long hair. This leaves much room for error.
2. Try to finish with slightly less long but still quite long hair.
3. Particularly keep #2 in mind every time you go to 'even things up' because that's the sort of perfectionism that results in unintentional mullets.
3. Cut your hair dry if possible. For those of us blessed with naturally curly hair (and let's all spare a moment now for that little girl in the Peanuts who probably only had that brief period of time to actually like her hair) straighten it if you can, if not, sigh and just do the thing wet. But dry is good since you can see at once what damage you've done.
4. Cheat. In my case this involved looking like a complete idiot while juggling scissors, comb and a metal ruler.
5. Cut small sections that are close together in both latitude and longitude - that bit should probably all be about the same length, right, and possibly around the same length as the bit next to it... and so on.
6. Nice tip is to twist the little sections tightly up, then cut on the twist. This makes the cut a little less AUGH! IT'S A HUGE STRAIGHT BOX OF HAIR!!
7. Cut on a day when you have at least three days before leaving for said interviews. That way someone else can come along and fix whatever you did.

However, if once I wash it and fuss with it it still looks like it does at the moment, I think I might have just gotten away with it this time. I look pretty good!

Tune in tomorrow. I might have really exciting tips about buying pantyhose.

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