I would like you to know that normally I'm a pretty nice person. Ordinarily, if there were no one behind me, I would have stopped for you and waved for you to go ahead and cross the street. It's not that much time for me and it's just a polite and friendly thing to do.
But I did not stop for you. I went right on past, without even a smile. I know. However in my defense:
1. You were wearing a silk shirt in a truly vile shade of orange.
2. You had it unbuttoned to expose the quite impressive crop of chest fur you've been cultivating.
3. Also there was bling. Quite tacky, shiny, "gold" bling.
4. Finally, and this hurts me to say, you were picking your nose - like up to the first knuckle picking, and there seemed to be the beginnings of a mouth-ward movement going on.
Which is why I had to look away and drive on past you sir.
I do hope you understand.